It is time to revamp the blog. The pictures are a little old…and we want to start updating it more with current stuff…and Laura just likes change sometimes. 
We have probably lost all of our followers, but that’s fine, things have been a little crazy around here lately. So crazy, that sometimes I think I am losing my marbles. Some would say I never had any, but I don’t talk to those people anymore… Okay, enough of the crazy talk. So maybe I should update you guys…
Garon started working at Charter. He likes his job, it was a difficult at first, but he has learned a new confidence from it. He has to help difficult people with their technological problems, and sell them products. So he is getting awesome at dealing with difficult people. That is a very much needed skill in life. He is doing very well in school, and making great grades. He cooks a few nights a week, juggles our crazy finances, and cheers me on for another day. God has given me a great man. Garon is also trying to get an Ultimate Frisbee thing going on up here for Sunday afternoons. He decided that now that he works at a desk, he needs the exercise. So he works hard, and in his spare time, helps friends out with car mechanics and fixing their computers. He stays quite busy, but I think he likes it that way. Sooo, enough about him, before he gets embarrassed, and on to my crazy life. Maybe I should find a new adjective…
I work full time, take one class (which I am majorly struggling with), and go to the doctor. You would think a year and a half after surgery, I would be fine. Well, I am not in pain from the endo. I am just dealing with the after effects of endometriosis. Hello, migraines, TMJ, and sinus/allergy problems. However, the docs all say these are fixable things, and I am not going to die from them. I’m still in pain, but in a different way. This pain does not keep me from functioning, it just makes everything a little more difficult. I have good days, and I have bad days. The weird thing is that endometriosis can cause all of those things to happen, so they are all inter related. I am thankful I have a job where I work Saturdays and Sundays, so that I can go to the doctor on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I get an allergy shot once a week, which is a thirty minute appointment, to make sure I don’t have an attack. Then I get regular chiro adjustments, massage (to help with the migraines and TMJ), physical therapy, and hormone appointments. I am scheduled to have sinus surgery, the first week of December. It turns out my sinus passages have extra cells, that block them. This prevents my sinuses from ever draining fully. I have to take three to four decongestants a day. This only gives me a window each time of about an hour of relief. Fun huh? We may have to cancel this, because we can not afford it at this time. So the sinus pressure causes headaches and the TMJ causes headaches. I am just one big headache huh? Especially to my hubbie, hahaha. I sleep every night with a night guard on, but when those jaw muscles get enflamed…. they said my TMJ is not like regular TMJ. It is from having pain in other parts of my body (endometriosis). The doctors said it was my way of dealing with all the pain I was in. So it is like my jaw is sprained. However my sprain can never heal, because we use our jaws for almost everything! It just needs rest, but every time I worry about anything… it just gets worse. We’ll have a few weeks where things are great, and I just go to the doc to keep it from flaring up again. Then we’ll have weeks of just trying to get the inflammation under control. This is not to complain… just for info on how to pray for us. As a praise, I am completely off of any pain meds (except for Advil) and got off my antidepressant which helped with the hormone junk. That was not fun to get off of. It caused dizziness, me seeing stars, and nausea. But I’m done with that, Praise God. So the Lord is healing me, we just take two steps forward, and then a step back. It is slow going, but if you knew me when I was in pain everday… I just remind myself of that when I get discouraged. God has been soooooo faithful.
The hysterectomy has helped tremendously, but who knew that would open another kettle of worms? They could not know exactly what it would do to me, because everyone is actually different. If my hormones get low, I cry and cry. My skin can not stand to touch anything, especially anything metallic. Like the tub, jewelry, etc. Then I can’t sleep. I get off my sleep med. this month. I’m really nervous. I’m about to be med. free and it terrifies me. But if I take too many hormones, the endo comes back and the pain in my back puts me back in bed. So it is a fine line we walk. The only other thing that bothers me as a result of the hysterectomy… is the weight gain. I have gained more weight, than I ever have in my whole life. I never knew I was soooo vain. I am the vainest person you will ever meet. You would never think it, based upon the way I look. Ha! But I have a lot of pride. God is helping me with that though. It’s hard to work out, when your head always hurts. I can do what I have to, but when that’s done, I just want to lie down. But enough of all that, there are other symptoms… but too personal. I’ll save you the gory details…. I know, I know, that was all pretty gory, but you have no idea… haha
School is killing me, but only because working and health stuff wears me out. I just don’t have much time left to give it what it deserves. But Lord willing, I’ll pass… and if I’ll study…
Work is good. I’m pretty good at selling… I make good commissions, and do my best. I love the apartments. They are of great quality and in the prettiest neighborhood. It’s easy to sell, when you would buy it yourself in a heartbeat. People have been so kind to me at work. I do side jobs like cat sitting, and make really good. Another resident, gave me enough Christmas decorations for a house! We have an awesome Christmas tree… all free. So God is greatly blessing me there…
Finances are extremely rough right now. From the debt when I could not work, to the debt in medical bills I incur each week. We still have to pay more than we earn, but it gets better each day. Some have asked why don’t we get two jobs apiece. Well, we feel like the Lord wants us to have time for Him, time for service, and at least one evening a week together as a family. (even if it is just a family of two) I also am unable to because of my other health concerns. We actually make enough in commissions for an extra part time job, but we still struggle. We also feel that we are called to finish our schooling, and at that point we will go somewhere and get jobs that pay more in our field. If we quit now, it would only take that much longer to finish, and that much longer to pay our debt off. Believe me, we have weighed all of our options. This is where God has called us, and we will stay until He says it is time to do something different. We know our lives will always be different anyways, since we are called to such a specific ministry. It just makes us depend on Him all the more.
Sometimes I have doubts about what I am doing here…Other times I just know this is what I am meant to be doing. (counseling) One of these days, Garon and I will look back on this time, and probably think, those days were so great… We have so many awesome friends here, that love us and support us. It makes the times when we miss our family, so much more bearable. I have no clue what God plans to do with all this, but even through my tears, I WOULDN”T HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY. All praise and glory to the Father above, who showers us with so many spiritual blessings. Thank you Jesus for taking a wretch like me and making me your beloved child.
With our new schedules, we seem to find less and less time to post about our super busy lives. Now that we both have full time jobs and are taking one class a piece, not to mention our extra curricular activities, we’ve been running around a lot. As with any big schedule change, it takes a while to get adjusted and when you don’t have enough time in the day, it just makes it worse. So we could definitely use your prayers in learning how to prioritize things right and get some sort of rhythm going.
As for my new job, its a lot different than I thought it would be. Where UPS was physically taxing, Charter is mentally taxing, so its been quite an adjustment in that learning how to deal with angry customers all the time. The Lord has certainly been faithful, though, and given us exactly what we need, when we need it. Hopefully the next time we post won’t be so long, but I can’t make any promises.
Finally, after months of searching, the Lord has blessed me with a new full-time job. Starting Monday, I will be employed at Charter Communications as a Broadband Technical Support Specialist (ie answer phone calls and tell people how to fix their computer). Its not a glorious position, but the opportunity for advancement seems high. I start Monday and enter a 5 week training period, Monday thru Friday, from 9AM to 6PM where I get to learn the ins and outs of call center life. Once I complete that, my shift will be from 7AM to 4PM everyday except Thursday and Sunday. Sadly, I will miss my nights because I was able to do stuff whenever I wanted to during “normal person” time. Now I will have the same restraints as everyone else. Well, thank you for praying and continue to pray that I will have plenty of opportunities to advance so we can get some of this debt down!
Well, while you’re waiting for us to update this blog, you can always check out my more theological blog. Surprisingly, there’s been some activity over there: http://blog.griffshp.com
A couple of weeks ago, I went on a vacation (from school anyway) to Auburn to help orgainze the mini baja race we had there. For those who don’t know, I used to be on the mini baja team in college where we designed, built, and race one seated off-road race cars. Now, I get to help put on a race to try to tear them up! It was like we had a reunion of all my old friends, a great time was had by all! Here’s some pictures from the race:
UofL's car
Auburn's Car
Acceleration Event - Drag Race Style
Me running the acceleration event
So, it’s been a while since I’ve published on the site. Laura has done such a good job that I’ve just let her take care of it for a while, but now I’ve got something to say. I’m looking for a full-time job. With our finances being way off balance and still accruing debt in this crappy economy, our whole outlook on what we initially set out to do when we came up here has had to change. As you know, Laura has had to step away from being a full-time student and got a full-time job,which has certainly helped, but we’re still accruing debt, and that’s not good. So, if you could, please pray that the Lord will miraculously provide me with an engineering job. I never persued this when I was looking before because it’s almost impossible to find a part-time engineering job. However, now that I am looking, it would be greatly beneficial if we could find a job that I actually have a degree in. However, the challenges I’m facing now is that I don’t have much experience and it’s been a while since I’ve been in school. I’m sure there’s something out there I can do, I just haven’t found it yet. The best possibility is getting a position in the engineering department at UPS, but nothing has come of that yet. So, I would grealy covet your prayers as we try to figure this out.
And while you’re at it, please continue to pray for Laura. Pain wise, she is much better than she was a year ago, however, she is still far from being healthy (sinuses headaches, hormone balance, TMJ – to name a few). Thanks!
Well, it’s been a few weeks, and I forgot to tell you guys… This past March 5 was mine and Garon’s four year anniversary. It feels like we’ve been married FOREVER, but in a good way. I can’t remember what it was like without him in my life. It has pretty much become a tradition now, but we love to go to the Melting Pot for dinner. We like things kind of low key. We enjoy hanging with friends and going to concerts and events, but there is nothing like just relaxing, having dinner, and maybe renting a movie. He’s my comfort zone, where I can totally be myself. Plus this year, we had a coupon for a free dessert, and it’s like a ten dollar value. Can’t beat that! This is not a place we would ever go to for anything else, but a fancy event. So might as well enjoy it! Dinner was excellent, the company even better, and it’s kind of sad, but we never even fool with pics. It feels great to have four years under our belt. They haven’t always been easy, but it has definitely been worth it. I can’t wait for our 50th anniversary with all of our adopted kids and their grandchildren. Or maybe just our great nieces and nephews…whatever…He’s gonna be a handsome distinguished gentleman.
Well, it’s been a pig’s age since I have updated the blog. I absolutely love my job. It is such a nice career, on such a nice property. I get to walk around the grounds, meet people, and do paperwork. All of which I love. I like working the weekends by myself, because I just take my little list and work at my own pace. Plus the weekends are quite slow. I haven’t spent much time on the computer lately, because in the evenings I crash. It is tough getting used to a new schedule, but I like it very much. I loved getting a paycheck this past week. Woohoo! Although it is already spent, and going to pay off some debts, it is still nice. Garon is working hard, studying and working nights. I have been prepping my dinners in the morning before I leave for work, so I can just relax when I get home. I get up at 5:30 am to try to exercise, study my Bible, and prep dinner. My husband gets home about 4 am. So we don’t really sleep much together. LOL!!! TMI, I know. hee hee You know what I mean. I am pretty busy with my bible studies (Tues. and Infertility). Garon has one on Wednesday nights. However, we get to spend a ton of time together, because we have every evening from 6 pm until 11:15 pm. My boss is awesome, and a little blonde haired, blue eyed, Irish lady. I can not wait until Easter. We are closed, and one of my friends at Tues. night Bible Study and Sunday School is having a few of us over for dinner. I’m taking homemade Mac and Cheese. I am trying to be more frugal and disciplined. Not only with our finances, but with my body and my time management. I am not there yet, but I am working on it. I want to cut out my sugar. I am concerned about my sugar levels. We’ll see how it goes. My hormones are going well, I finally have a system going. Yay! It’s getting much better. I am so thankful to have a great job, that allows me to pursue the Lord, my husband, and take care of my health. God is soooooo GOOD!!!
CONFESSIONS OF A PASTOR’S WIFE
by SelahV on March 30, 2009
From God’s Call to God’s Sanctification: It’s not easy being me.
It made no sense. I’d been born-again all of 8 months. I sat in an auditorium in Ridgecrest, North Carolina listening to Bertha Smith challenge us all to pray for the Lord to bring forth laborers for His harvest. That tiny gray-haired lady charged us to pray that people hear and heed the call to missions, to ministry, to evangelism. She exhorted us with Isaiah’s words: “Here am I, send me”.
I prayed for others. I asked God to call men to ministry. Then I heard a voice say, “You.” I’m hearing things. Bertha Smith must have said that. [For the rest of the call click on SelahV Today at the end of this post.]
I must confess. I was not even close to what I’d consider a mature Christian when I first became a pastor’s wife. There is so much I’d know today that I wish I’d known in our first pastorate. There are so many things I’d have done differently. But I did what I knew to do at the time.
Every minister’s wife carries an image of what her role is to be in her husband’s ministry. Each member of a church carries an image of what her role is suppose to be, also. I’d watched my minister’s wife and grew to believe she was the ultimate model of what a pastor’s wife could possibly be. I began to have severe doubts about myself and thought God must have an incredible sense of humor. I’d told her once in our conversations, “I could never be a preacher’s wife.”
God needed to prepare me to be the helpmate my husband would need as he abandoned himself to the Lord’s call upon his life. Minister’s wives are not like the plumber’s, the carpenter’s, or even a surgeon’s. No. People do not weigh her every action and place any demands upon her to fix the leaky faucet, repair a door-jam or perform an appendectomy. Other vocations do not require anything of a wife to accomplish a task. A wife is simply a wife. A minister’s wife is called along with her husband to minister. It’s a twenty-four-seven position. Our husbands truly need us to undergird, support and encourage.
We are called to be all things to all people at all times in order that we might win some. We are called to turn the other cheek; to be sober and exhibit gentle demeanors. Our attitude must never be guided by our emotions, a slight, a rejection, a burden or a criticism. We are to hold our heads high and smile at all times. We must shake every hand and pat every head and hear every complaint. We must always know where our husbands are, and be ever-ready to relay any message to him, and if he doesn’t act upon that message, we are accountable for his inaction. We’re expected to know exactly how each congregant feels because they shared details with our husbands in a counseling session. (Never mind that our husbands would not divulge such confidences with us-surely we should know anyway.)
Our children must sit in absolute silence like privates at Camp Lejune, North Carolina while listening attentively to every word our husbands say. They must be dressed in spic and span condition and exemplify all the fruit of the Spirit. We are to have a perfectly clean and organized house. We are to live on less than what our members live on but dress above our means and bring elaborate dishes to every potluck.
We must be in attendance at everything at all times to support the work of others in the Lord. We are to answer questions of “What do you think?” with non-answers that have nothing to do with what we think, but with neutrality. We are on call at any moment, at all hours of the night, to carry on without our spouses and we are to get absolutely giddy for the pleasure of not having his company. We are not to be sick or in need of our spouse’s attention. We are to have as much theological and doctrinal knowledge as any seminary graduate and have ready answers to any question posed. All the while our opinions and thoughts are not our own, but representative of our husband’s. And he is held accountable for all we think, say and do.
In other words we are called to be perfect, because our Lord was perfect.
Hmmmn. Do I believe all this? Of course not. Did I believe this? I sure did. When my husband took his first pastorate, I lived in a fishbowl of unreasonable and ludicrous thinking. As a minister’s wife, I tried to be what each and every person expected of me. I failed miserably. Seeking the approval of man rarely succeeds.
As God worked in me through the years, I came to the peaceful conclusion that my greatest calling was to be my husband’s soulmate. I learned that God had called my husband to pastor, to preach, to minister and He could do a much better job with him than I could. I was his cheerleader, his confidant, his greatest fan. I learned to submit to him in whatever way he considered best for me-even when I wanted to do something great for the Lord. I consulted him. It’s when I went against his advice I often found myself swimming upstream.
I learned far too late that my greater attention should have been towards my own children and not all the children of the world. I found that living “without” in contentment was far more wonderful than living “with” in discontentment. I learned to hold my piece when I wanted to give a piece of my mind.
I learned that hospitality didn’t mean a spotless home and fancy dinners, but open doors and empathetic ears. I discovered a cup of cold water and a box of tissues meant more than homemade cookies hot from the oven. I learned I cannot control what other people think of me, nor how they speak of me. I learned that what others think of me or speak of me neither determines my worth nor validates it as truth. I learned that holding grudges and bitterness hurt only me and my relationship with the Lord. I found that people are people and each person is growing in Christ on God’s timetable-not mine.
So many things God set me apart to be in my life: Daughter, wife, mother, pastor’s wife, employee, writer, friend. But the greatest relationship and role I’ve ever had is a child. His child. God used my mother and father to bring me into the world, but He, alone, is the creator of my life. He knew me before I was formed in my mother’s womb. He protected me from my own mother as she carried me in her womb. He knitted me together. What others counted as worthless, God counted as significant. He had a plan for me. He feeds me with His Word and lives within my heart. He abides in me and I in Him and He never lets me go. Every day God works out more of His plan with my life.
I am awed. After all these years, He still is interested in me.
To all ministers’ wives everywhere, I offer this: The best of oneself is all one can give and, at times, what we think is our best is the worst of us which must be surrendered to our Father’s merciful hands. If a pastor’s wife gives herself first to God, He will fill the role most needed in her for all. selahV
[copyrighted, 2008, SelahV Today, hariette petersen]
